Cover the Earth.

As I gaze out the window I can't help but to see two things. The first being immediate beauty, the second being intense corruption. It's a wicked weird contradiction, but it's there. It's a real life battle between Heaven and hell. It's the realness of night upon even the brightest of days.

Life's been nothing short of amazing lately. Yet I know if I take a step out of my front door I'm attacked by images, tastes, smells, sounds of things unclean, impure, unholy. It tests me, it trials me, it challenges me to be a better Christ-follower. It reminds me that without my Savior that I'm a wilted rose, lying trampled on the ground.

I don't believe that the world has realized that without their Savior's love they live in corruption. I believe that the world has actually finally started to see that the world is not healthy anymore. There are healthy parts of the world, don't get me wrong. It's just that the healthy parts are being overthrown by the viruses and the diseases of corruption.

That said, I don't believe I'm a healthy part of the world right now. In fact, I'd challenge anyone to call me healthy in the Spirit of God. My soul is burning for the fire it once had. My heart is aching, dare I say striving, yearning for the love I once knew. That raw, sensual, passionate love. It's there, I feel it. I know it to be real.

Sunday was a perfect day. I can't get over it. It affirmed, reaffirmed, and confirmed all my wondering of God lately. He is real. He is present. He is in pain for this broken world. He will return. He will judge. It may happen in my lifetime. The cards are beginning to line up, the path beginning to be cleared.

I'm listening to Brian Littrell's song "In Christ Alone" right now and these words come to me extremely poignant...

"In every victory, let it be said, my source of strength, my source of hope is Christ alone."

I must remember this as I cover the earth with His love. It's not for my admission into heaven. It's my submission to the Grace that took the nails for me. Seeking Glory in humbleness will ultimately show Love beyond measure.

Tonight, I pray for this earth. That we truly awaken.

Sing the song of angel choirs.

Today, I made a huge decision musically. I was on the phone with Andrew for a decent amount of time today and we got talking about music. Specifically vocals. My voice isn't near the quality or consistency that it used to be and it's really dragging me down, even emotionally. I need to get it back in shape, especially if I'm supposed to use this to further His kingdom. I know I'm supposed to use it, I know I won't get to unless I treat it like the gift that it is. So that leaves it up to me to meet God where He wants me to.

I also had some new lyrical words of beauty wrap themselves around me last night. You guessed it, I'm sharing them now. I was listening and currently am still listening to Roby Duke. He passed away the day after Christmas last year. I sat in several Christian Musician Summit Workshops with him, even talking to him after. He's inspiration.

--- "Empty"

I walk along the pathway of mediocre
Praying that it leads to more than just average
I can't tell You how long I've been waiting
To find the reason for being alive

Oh Lord, I'm tired of being empty
Saying Your name, but playing this game as mine
Oh Lord, I'm tired of being empty
Won't you come in?

Fill me...
Fill me...
Fill me with Your holy fire
Fill me...
Fill me...
Fill me with Your desire.

Fearfully, I tread in the waters of jealousy
Making myself the fool I tell them not to be
I can't tell You how long I've been waiting
To wash these feelings away in Your tide

Oh Lord, I'm tired of being empty
Saying Your name, but playing this game as mine
Oh Lord, I'm tired of being empty
Won't you come in?

Fill me...
Fill me...
Fill me with Your holy fire
Fill me...
Fill me...
Fill me with Your desire.

Oh God, I am begging
Oh God, I am screaming
Fill me, fill me, fill me with fire,
Fill me, fill me, fill my heart's desire

I need you Lord, I need You
I need you Lord, I need Your truth

----

What I find most interesting about the lyrics I've been writing lately is that I still am on these wonderful, marvelous highs. Yet, all I can seem to do is write out of a place of utter despair and hunger. Logically, you'd think I'd be writing Praise and Celebratory songs of Worship. Yet, all I can do is get humble, see the real me, and walk in that. I am such a sinner. We are all such sinners. The reality of our corruption is devastating.

The reality of my part of this corruption is devastating.