Doesn't it hurt...?

Doesn't it hurt when you come to the realization you invested so much in something, so much into a relationship with someone...

and you come to find that you don't make the grade. That you don't make the final cut. I know that I shouldn't feel this way, but the more I really grasp it, the more I think about how much I make this person a priority, not because I have to, but because I want to, and how they don't even consider me a part of their friends and good times. It honestly hurts me. I feel like crying insanely hard right now. I probably will later on just so I don't feel so tense and bottled up. Seriously though. This person says one thing, we have GREAT times, and I'm not even associated in their life outside our friendship.

It really, REALLY, hurts. I guess you learn the hard way sometimes. I love my connection with this person more than anything but it is worth it if I don't feel like I'm actually valued?

I don't want anything more than a solid friendship, a phone call, a true thank you for continually making my schedule mold to theirs, and genuine appreciation. It's not hard. It's a simple investment of a little bit of time. I just don't understand.

I'm not selfish, I'm just standing up for what I believe should be a decent friendship. I don't feel like it truly is. It's even got me thinking a horrible thought. That thought is right now I'm awfully close to leaving my opportunity because of it. My opportunity has become my passion and I really really want to see it grow, to see me grow, but I don't know how when the person who is supposed to be there with/for me the most, doesn't see me as what I thought they did.

I'm breaking down.