Today's not one of them. Granted, I'll be tired to the maximum by the end of tonight because I'm going to be up until around midnight. That's not the point though. The point is this: I've had brilliant conversations, I've had lingering conversations, I've had passionate conversations, and I've had heartwrenching conversations. I just got off of the phone with Bretten. We started talking at like 11:30, it's now 2:40. We didn't talk. We prayed together. I haven't done that with anyone in an intimate setting like that for a very long time. I really enjoyed it. Really and truly. We sung a cappella with each other. It was the bonding of a glorious friendship. Sealed. He may be gone for few weeks now, but that's fine. Most of the friends I choose are travellers. I don't mind it. My closest friends are the ones farthest away minus a few locals here and there.
Anyways, digging deeper. I'm coming clean tomorrow. Again. It seems like this following God thing is always about coming clean and trying your darndest to stay that way. Whether I like it or not. I won't ever come close to pure. I can only strive deep within me with the power of Christ. I've gotta let Him in. I can't fear the fire when it comes, because it does and it's what should be happening. I get that fire, and then I get scared. I can't get scared. Being fearful is cool. Getting scared affects the Kingdom negatively.
I'm going into Missions Fest tomorrow, and all of Saturday. Hoping to be revolutionized. To be activated. To be driven so deeply into a passionate calling that even thinking about turning back feels like betrayal of God's glory. There's just certain things I haven't done. I haven't done a mission. I've wanted to for a long long time. Now's where I hit the ground running. It's a full fourteen hours of missions talk, and getting connected with a possible mission. Now is the time for me to shine the light.
There are so many things happening. It's time to take back my generation.
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