The Heart Scars

You whisper coldly into my ear
Sending shivers, feeling too familiar
Breath on my neck, hot, sweet breath
I don't know what kind...
But it makes an everlasting memory...

The way the heart scars when exposed to you
The way the soul cries for relief from the heat
The way the arms bleed for a simple release
Your melody along the keys
Drives me to the verge of insanity

You touch my shoulder, my heart races
You slide your fingertips down to mine
You come to chorus, confessing your sin
As you begin...

The way the heart scars when exposed to you
The way the soul cries for relief from the heat
The way the arms bleed for a simple release
The addictive refrain you sing
Pushes me towards the verge of delirium

You build the chords, speeding through time
Wanting more than the music is willing
More than the spirit contains...
Lost in the passion, the chorus of desire
You continue to assault the keys of my heart
Through the the movements of your fingers

The way the heart scars when exposed to you
The way the soul cries for relief from the heat
The way the arms bleed for a simple release
The rhythm you carry,
Brings me to my knees unwillingly

Tracing, racing, bracing for a reality
Once unrealized, cruel brutality
You've weakened me, drawn me in
Placed kisses upon my virgin skin
I want to let go, I want to give in
Your sweet, sweet melody...
Has brought upon you an unhallowed sin

The way the heart scars and scars, but you don't ever stop
The way the soul cries and cries, but you don't ever think twice
The way my arms bled and bled, bled for the shame I felt
As you took me into your melody
As you played a sweet melody
As you tortured my soul
You knew you had power, you knew you had control.

Bodies shifting, the moonlight dancing upon our skin
You make me do things I don't want, yet I can't get enough
I tell you "no", tears cascading from my eyes
You see the fear and it only persuades
The melody to come faster

I plead again "please, please, no", shaking in shame
You step back, the melody fades
The chords become sad and forgiveness they beg
You grab me suddenly, the chords booming again
You kiss me, the waves crashing upon the keys
You let me go, begin to say...

I don't give you a chance, I run away...

The way my heart scarred over you...
The way my soul cried for relief of you...
The way my arms bled because of you...
Yet I still can't help but be drawn in,
Your rhythm intoxicating, your chords perfectly arranged,
Your melody enchanting, your attractiveness never left

But like every good song, this one's reached its end
You've never come back, but you and your melody
Are forgiven.

The old me still resounds within me.

I was cleaning out my room and came across an old journal and this particular (among a few others I'll be posting throughout the coming weeks) struck me.

Dated: September 19th, 2005

The skies are overcast and the smell of freshly cut grass invades my senses. So many walks of life surround me. Some painfully rich. Some painfully just making ends meet. Some old, some just on the brink of growing up. Different colors of skin. Different accents on their tongues. Strangely though, they're all like me. Human, and just trying to fit in. Girls with long hair and twelve dollar tubes of lip gloss, and guys in their dark rinse jeans, dark glasses, and cornrows. Each having something to offer from fashion tips to religious music choices to the best new recipe out there. I scream diversity and turn heads. After all, I'm just like them. Just trying to fit in.

The feel of Glass hearts.

Have you ever felt as if your heart was glass? So fragile. So intricately laced. Lately, mine has felt interestingly complete. Just days ago it felt as if I was shattered. Still dealing with close family friend deaths, family deaths, and a friend passing away, I had lost central sight of who I was, where I was, and what was around me. In a sense I had become numb to everything. I still am skating on that line a little I think. Making very sure I don't trip the alarm. The people around me have been so comforting, loving, and truthfully if it weren't for them, I'd still be sobbing in my sleep.

I guess what I'm saying in the midnight hours tonight is that instead of my heart looking like this:



It looks like someone who lives a blessed life. I am so thankful.

Silence Follows.

Silence follows the broken hearted
Silence haunts the shattered lives...

Live in loudness cascading all around,
Teach the world to sing in all the storm.

Where would we be without a little song in our heart?
Where would you be without the loving embrace of chords in stereo?

Silence follows the ones who break hearts
Silence haunts the ones who shatter lives.

Let it go, let the music SURROUND you...
Let it go, let the rhythm OVERWHELM your being,
Take in the melody just one more time...

Forgive those who need forgiveness indeed.
Repair those who need repairing indeed.

If you let it the music will heal you, will calm you, will restore you.
Open your eyes through your ears,
See the world, with no more fears...

Take a chance, let the chorus preside in grand fashion
So you may know...

That silence doesn't always have to follow your broken heart like a police chase on the freeways of life.
That silence doesn't have to haunt you as you leave the pieces of your glass heart shattered on the floor.

Take a step into the sound, take a leap into the love of loud, RESOUND.
Trust yourself, and trust in the song.

Bold harmonies take away the tears
Trust.
Walk where the silence cannot follow. Live where the silence cannot haunt.

Take a step into the sound, take a leap into the love of loud, RESOUND!